merry christmas.

I wrote a summary of my day in a email to a friend, but I thought I'd share it here:

Well, Christmas was an interesting one.  We woke up and did stockings and gifts, and then had breakfast with us four, Gramma,my great aunt and uncle, and my aunt and uncle from Oregon.  We were just about finished when Mom got a call on her cell phone from the hospital saying that Papa's blood pressure was extremely low and that we should come soon.  That kicked us into gear, let me tell you!  Aunt Kathy and Uncle Dwayne left right away with Gramma, Uncle Cliff and Aunt Jerre close behind, then Lindsay and Dad were next.  Mom and I stayed about 5-10 minutes longer and got the breakfast leftovers put away and got most of the dishes off the table, rinsing a few, but really leaving a big mess.  When we arrived at the hospital we received word that Papa had stopped breathing but they have resuscitated him. The mood at the hospital was somber, where we spent most of the day.  Another aunt and uncle, along with 2 cousins arrived a couple of hours after we did.  We basically all took turns going into the room and saying our goodbyes or whatever.  Not much had changed most of the day, so Mom and I decided to come home around 3 and get dinner going, because goodness knows everyone still wanted to eat! Actually, we tried to keep things as semi-normal as we could.  Gramma said it best, "If he could see us, Papa would probably wonder why we were all sitting here just waiting..."  Anyway, Mom and I got breakfast dishes cleaned up and dinner going.  Eventually Lindsay and my great aunt and uncle came home.  We got a call from Dad shortly after that the 3 kids and Gramma had discussed what to do and decided that if something happened again that they shouldn't go to any extra measures to save his life.  I think once that decision was made, things got a little easier, if that makes any sense.  It's in God's hands now when He takes Papa.  It might seem a bit selfish, but a few of us were praying that he would just make it through Christmas.  It's not so much this year, but all the years following that we didn't need that to be the day Papa died.  Anyway, dinner was good and overall it was nice to spend the day surrounded by family, even if the circumstances weren't grand.  It will definitely be a Christmas we remember!

I truly am thankful for family here, although it was hard to have what felt like a hole at the table for dinner.  It just didn't seem quite right without Papa there...